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How to grief loss?

How to grief loss?
How to grief loss?

How to grief loss?

Have you lost a loved one in death? We are going through a process of grief described better by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross in On Death and Dying. In it, he mentions five stages that people go through — denial and division; anger; negotiation; depression, and ultimately acceptance. The dead, as well as their loved ones, go through these stages, though they are rarely at the same time and these stages are unpredictable.

You may think you are in a rage, and then you jump into depression and then, back into denial. There is no agreement or reason — only what seems right to each person at that moment. No one can predict how long the phase will last. If you are grieving and someone with good intentions suggests that you should not feel the way you do, kindly thank them for your concerns but know that you are where you should be.

Sadly, though, at times you will notice that something is wrong. You may be thinking, "I should be done with this by now" or "I do not want to feel this way." If you, yourself, feel that it is time to move on, you can trust that feeling.infomationzon.

I like to talk about grief from the perspective of Choice Theory. This will most likely take a few presents to sort out everything. I need to start with the Choice Theory statement that all behaviors have a purpose as grief is just behavior in terms of choice theory. Optional theory tells us that everything we do at any given time is our best effort to achieve what we want — a certain image in our Quality World that will address at least one of our issues somehow or another.. Grief is not like that.

Once you understand that all behavior has a purpose and that grief is the best human effort to achieve what one wants, it is easy to know what to do about it. What might we be trying to get out of grief? Most people would say there is no alternative. When our loved ones die, we mourn. I say it is natural that we will remember the presence of a person in our lives but it is inevitable that we should be sad, not in the way most people think sadness.

The first thing I believe is that we are trying to deal with our grief from the deceased. When we are sad, it is our best effort to keep that person alive, at least in a world we can imagine. We know that they are no longer in the physical world as we know it. However, if we continue to think about them, treat them badly, grieve their presence, then it keeps the thought of that person working in our perception and feels better for us than the complete absence or absence of someone else.

Another possible benefit of grieving is that it shows others how much we care and love for the dead. I do not suggest that people cheat on their grief. What I am saying is that there is something worthwhile in grief because it shows others how much we cared for them. It also says, "See how beautiful I was." Fill in the blanks with husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, mom, dad, sister, brother, etc.

Grief is also an important factor in gaining support from others during the grieving process. People do things for us that we would normally do for ourselves. Once again, please do not think that I suggest that the grieving person get up and “decide” to cry so that someone can pass by the house with food. None of this you know but I am just pointing out the potential benefits of grief.

When we fully realize it and know what our sorrows do and do nothing for us, then it becomes a difficult part. We need to make some decisions about how we want to live.

There are at least three options in all cases and they can be arranged in terms of leaving, changing, or accepting. In the face of death, you may wonder how you will ever “leave him.” However, other possible alternatives could be severe rejection, suicide, drug and/or alcohol abuse, or drowning in mental illness, among others.infomationzon.

When we are caught up in a revolution, we may continue to grieve as we do our best to bring that person back. That may seem like a long, drawn-out procession to the cemetery, frequent discussions with the deceased, a refusal to believe that he is really dead, and he is constantly talking about the dead. There are many things we can do to try to change the reality of loss.

And if we accept it, we can find some measure of peace and meet the living.  A solid advance in this interaction is figuring out how in some way or another keep up with that individual's essence in our lives. Now, this is a personal matter and you should be very careful not to judge the choice of the bereaved.

Many people have seen Between Parents. In it, the character of Robert DiNero kept his mother's ashes in the trunk of his coat. Many people do this with the burnt remains of their loved ones. Others put ashes on their necks and put them on their necks. Some will set up scholarships or memorials. When my husband died, my family and I created a wrestling scholarship fund for a local high school athlete. When a friend of mine lost her 8-year-old son, she got the name of the Houston zoo as a frog show behind her!

There are all sorts of creative ways to maintain human existence. There is no wrong way. Anything that brings comfort to the bereaved should be supported by those around them. Remember that just because an individual chooses something offensive or wrong to you, does not make it wrong for that person.

When acceptance occurs, then the grieving person may begin to return to his or her life and the lives of those around him or her but it will not happen overnight. We need patience and understanding of those who return from tribulation.

Another option is for a person who does not seem to be grieving at all. There are a few potential clarifications for this conduct. An individual might be extremely clandestine and can't make their sadness out of general visibility. Another chance is that the individual is attempting to be strong over every other person. I realize I needed my children to KNOW that I would be fine. I didn't need them to accept that they needed to deal with me. To a few, it appeared to be that I was not adequately pitiful.

If you are sad or involved in the life of someone who is grieving, please do not judge yourself or them. Understand that every behavior has a purpose and a person gets something from what he or she does. When they realize that there is a choice, they can make a decision about which of the three decisions they want to make. Once they know where they want to go, they must disclose details of their plan.

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1 Comments

  1. I lost my mother on August 2017, from that day till now I m broke, have stress, anxiety and depression. Your this post motivated me. Thank you, such a nice article.

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